


there's no pain that i won't go through

by nbspandam



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-02
Updated: 2018-09-02
Packaged: 2019-07-05 18:29:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15869313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nbspandam/pseuds/nbspandam
Summary: Wolfram, over the course of time spent with Sieglinde Sullivan, changes.





	there's no pain that i won't go through

Wolfram is a soldier. Wholly obedient to the orders of his superiors and bound by duties given to him since the day he was born. 

To take care of a child… It’s far out of his expertise. He’s hardly ever met any, and even then he never paid any real attention to them. They were all gray, much like everything else in his life. Monochrome and unimportant. All he lived for was his next set of orders, his next mission. 

That way of life is the only thing keeping him from having doubts about this. If he’s told to serve a child, then he will. There will be more missions in the future, and he will not fail. It isn’t an option. 

\---

Wolfram is a butler. He’s not a good one, he’s aware of that much, but with no one to compare to he hardly concerns himself with improving. Not when Sieglinde is perfectly content with what he can offer, despite her complaints about his attempts at being strict with what he gives.

He just can’t refrain from giving in to her requests in the end, when it’s about something so trivial as getting more sweets or eating the same dish for dinner every day. The fact that she likes his cooking makes him feel something that he’s never felt before, and if he has to make himself sick of making Kaiserschmarren forever just to feel the effect her smiles have, then he will without a shred of hesitation. 

It takes him seven years to understand that his world has gone from grey to green. 

It takes him even longer to understand his own dedication to her. That what he feels, and has felt ever since the first time she’d pulled him into her games, is love. And that with this love, a desire to protect someone with so much to lose and so little to gain. 

\---

It takes him eleven years to grasp that what he loves can hurt him so. 

The bullet piercing through his flesh doesn’t compare to how much his heart aches at the sight of her tears, her worldview shattering at his feet. He’s betrayed her, in her eyes and in his own. Even worse is that he wants her to forgive him, to accept him despite that he’s robbed her of the life she could have lived, all to further the goals of those who stand above him, who  _ made him _ . 

It hurts. It hurts so, so much. But he can’t stop. Even if she grows to hate him, even if she resents him until the moment he takes his last breath, he has to protect her.

His world grew green because of her, and he won’t let it go back. So he keeps walking, keeps moving, and keeps everyone else from reaching her. 

Wolfram was a soldier. He was a butler too.

And now, he thinks, he’s a father. 

If only for a moment.


End file.
